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ruinedchildhood:

Spongebob is the mother fuckin devil

(via thatsmoderatelyraven)

Source: ruinedchildhood
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drinkmasturbatecry:

nudityandnerdery:

the-fandoms-are-valentines:

grandtheftautosanandreas:

Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters

they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay

He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis.”

"Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you.”

"He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way off.”

"It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro.”

"If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly.”

And, of course:

"The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t."

the one that will always stay with me is “Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath,” i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words.

(via octofirax)

Source: stonecoldstevebuscemi
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nakedmallrat69:

noislandofdreams:

fromrusholmewithlove:

theweightofjupiter:

bestofukpoliticians:

souvenirsandlostluggage:

The camera just turned itself on, I’m not a model


Look at this smarmy lizard bastard.

"Smarmy lizard bastard"

he looks like a surprised egg

His face looks like one of those masks out of The Purge

What a fucking div

"tesco magazine"

(via octofirax)

Source: souvenirsandlostluggage
Photo Set

livealiens:

#brownamericanproblems

(via blogzak)

Source: haringtonskits
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sofapizza:

dr-archeville:

Jon Stewart, The Daily Show, 2014-08-26, “Race/Off” [alternate link here]

Jon was FINALLY back last night, and hit it out of the freakin park with this Ferguson segment.

(via kibitalia)

Source: dr-archeville
Photo Set

toastydoodles:

How to fix all problems in Five Nights at Freddy’s. Either that or, y’know, quitting after the first night!

(No, Pirate Cove guy, you don’t get anything. >:C)

(via kibitalia)

Source: toastydoodles
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teamladsximpala:

arthurkirklandofficial:

kyriankreep:

mollyiscoolokay:

The year is 3000, my great great great grand daughter isn’t fine at all and freddos are £4 each

#the dfs sale is still on though

image

i dont know whats happening in this post

(via hakuna-makara)

Source: melrosedinerr
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shitshilarious:

queerqueerspawn:

james-tiqueerius:

queerqueerspawn:

glampersand:

glowcloud:

kittiesinqueerland:

robalyn:

the highlighted area is where Jason Derulo knows what the girls want. london to taiwan.

new york to haiti

greenland is right out

ummm no offense but new york to haiti should be measured as the area between the two latitudes, not the longitudes. this graph is incorrect and vastly underestimates the total region of the earth in which Jason Derulo knows what the girls want

Even measuring that way, Greenland remains right out, as does the entirity of Brazil.

Have we considered measuring by neither latitude nor longitude but in all area that would extend perpendicular from the diagonal of the two places?

There are many different interpretations of the data, and until more is available, we ought not conclude anything at this point.

In light of that, I posit this alternative map of regions where Jason Derulo is potentially claiming where he knows what girls want:

As we can see, if we assume that model, the vast majority of the area where Jason Derulo knows what girls want is either open ocean (the Atlantic, the Mediterranean Sea) or sparsely populated (the northern Sahara, the northern Arabian Desert, various desert portions of Iran and Afghanistan, and the southern Tibetan Plateau). Four of the ten most populated countries on the planet have no territory in it (Nigeria, Brazil, Japan, and Indonesia), and two which do have relatively little territory in it (the US and Russia). It is suggested that for all his boasting, Jason Derulo does not know what a probable majority of the world’s girls want.

Perhaps Jason Derulo’s intention was never to proclaim to be omnipotent to the interests of the female gender. Perhaps he was instead expressing his humanity, or the limits of his knowledge. I applaud Jason Derulo. Jason Derulo is not just another 2 dimensional character. Jason Derulo has depth.Jason Derulo has limitations and has come to terms with them. Jason Derulo knows Jason Derulo. Thats why he makes it a point to say his name so much.

(via theministryofmagicaremoronsgroup)

Source: robalyn